Civil Service

I begin my day at work each morning by listening to my voice mail whilst warming my hands on a steaming mug of vodka. It warms the soul, these precious moments listening to the questions and concerns from friendly community members.

Yesterday, amidst the pleasant, droning banality of the typical messages awaiting me, I came across this gem from a kindly, dare I say even avuncular, fellow who wanted to give me some cheerful advice. In his message, he said with elegant simplicity:

"It helps a lot to be transferred to someone who isn't there."

The good Samaritan then politely hung up without leaving his name or contact information. My mug and I concluded that it must have been his modesty that prevented him from doing so and a desire not to waste my time. He could only know that despite my busy shed-yool, I would hope to thank him for his selfless dispensation of  such sagacious wisdom.

I'm so glad we have a telecommunications system that is just modern enough to record callers' phone numbers. Won't he be surprised and delighted to hear from me and my mug tomorrow morning? I'm not quite sure what I will say exactly. Maybe when he answers the phone, I will say only:

"I'm here."

And then hang up.