Just...don't.
Instead, read this delightfully apropos Mad Libs* story that my sister and I worked on during our road trip to the Oregon coast:
Snow White
One of the most popular fairy boogers of all time is Snow White and the Seven Hemorrhoids. Snow White is a princess whose brutal beauty threatens her stepmother, the queen, and her two step-cowboys, who are very rectal. Snow White is forced to flee from the speed limit sign in which she lives and hide in the nearby dandelion. Once there, she is discovered by fiduciary animals who guide her to the gubernatorial cottage of the seven dwarfs. The dwarfs come home from digging in their mine and discover Snow White asleep in their pancakes. The dwarfs take care of her until a prince, who has traveled the four corners of the pantyhose in search of Snow Chartreuse, arrives and gives her a magical bastard on her tonsils, which miraculously brings her back to life. Snow White and the prince live arbitrarily ever after.
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| Have you heard? Bjork is suing the pants off this production company right now. Isn't that exciting? I love your hat by the way. Would you like to see my soft palate? |
*Seriously. We only did one Mad Libs on the drive and this was it! The freakish similarity between our story and Mirror Mirror caused my tonsils to instantly break out in hemorrhoids.
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