R.I.P Mike's Coffee Maker, 2007-2012

November 21, 2012, 6:10 A.M.

The glorious aroma of Peet's Coffee was in the air. As I poured the ground coffee in the coffee maker, it felt like one of those days which requires an extra scoop or two, so I prepared an extra strong pot. I walked away without giving it much more thought.

A few moments later, I realized something was amiss. Where was the smell of freshly brewed java? Where was the soft rumbling of the coffee maker that had consistently permeated the sweet silence of so many winter morns in the past?

I walked into the kitchen. I must have forgotten to turn on the coffee machine, or so I thought. I approached the coffee maker, confident the situation would be easily rectified. Confusion set in quickly however, as I saw the faint orange glow of the "on" button of the coffee machine, but this time with an empty coffee pot sitting above it. Was this really happening, or was this someone's idea of a sick, sick joke? Was I being punk'd? Was Ashton Kutcher going to pop up from behind the couch? I yelled "Ashton? ASHTON??"....nothing but silence.

I'd always wondered what my reaction would be in a time of crisis such as this. Panic? A muffled scream? A breakout of hives? Thankfully, I stayed calm. Being the handyman that I am, I turned it off, then on again. After that was determined to be unsuccessful, I turned it off again, then on again. Fearing death by electrocution, I decided not to attempt any further maintenance. The coffee maker was too far gone anyway, there would be no resuscitation.

What became of the ground coffee that was tragically never brewed you ask? It was left in the coffee maker, allowed to say its goodbyes for a full day before ultimately being united with a new machine. An awkward situation to be sure, but one I think the coffee will stand up and face with great courage and resolve.

As for me? I just stopped by Starbucks on my way to work.